PLEX86  x86- Virtual Machine (VM) Program
 Plex86  |  CVS  |  Mailing List  |  Download  |  Computer Folklore

Care and Feeding of persons 887


rpl

Well, there are exceptions to every rule...I guess they just go by "instinct", what movies did "okay" in those countries before, how much money is being risked, etc....but they COULD cancel, if they wanted to...should it really flop and they feel it's simply better to "cut losses" and give up...

Indeed, before DVDs - though, these days, the DVDs actually make MORE money for them than in the cinema, that the "economics" of before have changed around that they kind of "rush" to get things onto DVD, as that's the bigger market now - there used to be the phrase "straight to video"...in other words, they'd release in America - it doesn't work - so they skip releasing it anywhere else and "go straight to video"...a phrase often then used as a mockery: "Well, that's a 'straight to video' movie, if I ever saw one"...comic synonym for "it's crap" :)...

breastle screen for HLA Adventure Need help designing one 890
CBFalconer And here is the whole thing, written at a time when Great Britain was the worlds superpower. I had the name wrong. The occasion was, I believe...

Increasingly, the internet, DVDs and so forth are changing things around a bit...as noted, DVDs now are the bigger market than the actual cinema (so, you even see some "stars" now turning up on chat shows, not only to promote the cinema release...but then showing up to point out that their movie has now been released on DVD...more and more, the chances are, they'll be doing that more often, as cinema figures keep going down and DVD figures keep going up :)...and, for example, I pop onto American websites sometimes, just to look at all the "trailers" for the new movies...so, with the internet, it's global nature means that you really - like it or not - advertise to the entire world...they can "regionalise" the websites but you can always "jump" to a different regional website to see what they are watching this Summer

Actually, sorry, we actually say "films", not "movies" over here in the UK...but I've just gotten used to saying "movies" to accomodate our American cousins (and non-English speakers who are used to the American English, rather than the British - *ahem* original - English...so as not to be "confusing"...as, come on, trying to decypher one of my posts when English isn't your first language is difficult enough, anyway ;)...it's actually a bit "unnatural" to say "movie" rather than "film" for me, usually...though, of course, now that Lucas and everyone is using "digital cameras", maybe I should get used to "movie", as the word "film" no longer makes any sense with the digital stuff...ah, okay, for once an Americanism that's actually proved to be very smart, as it hasn't been made "obselete" by the use of digital cameras...the pictures still move, so it's still a "movie" :)

Anyway, yeah...the "delays" always used to seem "mysterious" to me before too...I thought it odd and wondered if it was any kind of "prejudice" or something silly like that...but, no, I saw it explained and then - duh! - it's actually bloody obvious why it happens...simple, basic practicalities: You can't have your "star" turn up on the red carpet to 27 completely different "premieres" all around the globe at the same time...so, "staggered release" in different countries, simply gives them time to fully promote it in one country, hop onto a plane and then do it all again in the next country (who has a release date slightly "delayed" to account for this that the "star" always turns up just before the movie goes on release to "drum up trade" to make people go watch it :)...

And, in fact - though sometimes a "star" does just show up for the hell of it because they like having some fun with a particular "favourite host" of theirs - you'll note the slightly obvious thing that "stars" only show up on most chat shows when they have "a new movie" or "a new series" or "the series is now out on DVD"...it's a simple "mutual interest" thing...the "stars" show up because they can "plug" whatever it is they want to sell...and the chat show gets its "stars", which gets the ratings and keeps their sponsors and advertisers happy...

Show business may be a funny "business" compared to other businesses...but, in the end, it is a business...and, yeah, you thought "movie stars" had a cushy life...well, okay, they DO have a brilliant job and it is a "cushy life"...BUT now you know what "staggered release" is all about, now you also realise that the "star" has to do all the big "premieres" and "chat shows" in one country, "tours" it to exhaustion...then jumps on a plane...and, yeah, does the whole thing all over again...pretending they are doing it for the first time (although, of course, they ARE "movie stars"..."pretending" is what their job is about...the unkind way to phrase it is that they are, in the end, "professional liars"...but the lie for "good reasons": Entertainment...although, at the same time, you CAN'T entirely trust what you see...the movie star looks "fresh", right? Nope, this is actually their 157th interview in months of non-stop interviews, photos and plane-hopping...of course, they get paid millions, they are adored, they live in big mansions, their actual "job" is more like "play"...so, you can't feel completely "sorry" for them or anything...BUT the idea that they don't have any "hard work" to do...not entirely true...all that interview after interview, chat show after chat show...okay, one interview is not "hard work"...but it's the tediousness of it that I'm thinking would drive you bananas...especially if there's some story...so, you know, Tom Cruise goes to one interview: "Do you still talk to Nicole Kidman?" and he explains it...then, next interview: "Do you keep in contact with Nicole?"...but *ahem* we must be "professional", yes? So, answer the SAME QUESTION all over again...then, next interview, the interviewer is equally unimaginative: "So, do you and Nicole still talk to each other?"...blah-blah-blah...the answering the questions isn't "hard"...but doing it over and over and over again? Worse, you jump on a plane...end up in Europe...and then it's the same questions all over again...oh, well...at least people have "funny accents" in Europe...that might add some "variety" that stops you going completely insane :)...

Hmmm, still want to be a movie star? Because the other facet is, of course, that every single interview - no matter how many you've done before or if you've heard the question a million times before - you have to appear "fresh"...you are, after all, "representing" the movie (and there's a lot of money and a lot of people behind that movie, so it isn't just yourself you've got to think about)...so, you can't come over as grumpy...or moody...or refuse to answer a question because you've heard it a hundred times before...it's always got to seem like your "enthusiastic" about the movie and that this is your first interview...every single time...

Of course, movie stars are, by definition, "specialists" at doing exactly that...appearing to be people they aren't...showing emotions that they don't actually feel...and so forth...and the irony is that they end up victims of their own talents: "Huh! Look at him there...he gets all that money and he doesn't do any hard work...look how casual and fresh-faced he is! I bet he's not done a day's work in months!"...then, you know, the media gets a story out of this by feeding that impression: "Cruise paid $5 million to sit on his fat arse!"...like 90% of stories about "celebrities", of course, it's completely made-up bullpoo...but so long as it isn't "libellous", they always get away with it...because, well, if Cruise took them to court then it looks bad on him: "I don't know...he gets paid $10 million for a movie but then tries to get even more money by suing people! Greedy bastard!"...so, 90% of the time the story is a lie or an exaggeration or a half-truth...but unless it's a serious slur - career-damaging stuff - then it's just allowed to "slide"...

Oh, here's another "big misunderstanding" people often have...movie stars wearing dark glbuttes indoors...what self-absorbed narcbuttistic idiots! Trying to "look cool" wearing the dark glbuttes...and wearing them indoors! How stupid is that?

Again, the real reason is basic practicalities...what happens when they walk in front of the press? Out come the flashbulbs! BANG! BANG! BANG! The light in your eyes is like a supernova has gone off in your face! BANG! BANG! BANG! If you weren't wearing dark glbuttes and you weren't prepared or accustomed then if you turned around to face a 100 flashbulbs firing off directly in your face, then you'd be blind for the next 7 hours...

So, you see, they wear the dark glbuttes very often simply to "be nice to their eyes"...and, yeah, you STILL wear them indoors because press photographers also come indoors...

Of course, the fact that they also give off this "cool" image at the same time...well, these people's jobs are all about "image" and "looking great at all times" - the "beautiful people" - so if everyone thinks it's "cool" then "who are we to shatter the illusion that it's all pretty boring mundane practicality?"...

Plus, there are some other "dubious" - but no less practical - reasons: If they are drunk or stoned or similar (well, you know what "stars" are like, yes? Too much money, too much time, nothing to do: They all go off and develop a "habit" with something then turn up on Letterman 5 years later to talk about their "rehab" ;)...the dark glbuttes have a secondary purpose in such cases to basically hide the fact that they are drunk or stoned off their face...the eyes are ALWAYS the big give away...so, they could - I stress could, as it could also be the legitimate thing of the "flashbulbs problem" earlier, so no buttuming everyone with dark glbuttes is stoned! - be simply trying to keep the fact that they got stoned just before arriving (usually because doing yet another "premiere" is so fracking boring that being stoned and seeing flying pink elephants and such...well, it breaks the tedium, yes? Truthfully, basically the same reason why kids go on drugs, most of the time, too...too much time, too much money, no common sense, bored out of their skulls...and the stupid fools think "well, it's something to do")...

Again, don't feel sorry for them...they are rich as hell for doing "work" that's more like "playing"...for movie stars and rock stars, you know they are doing what is their "hobby", anyway...no-one gets into that business "accidentally" (well, very few people do)...BUT it's not quite as "cushy" in all regards as it sounds...and that's why they all end up in "rehab" at some point...

BUT they aren't stupid...they know that half the point of it all is the "illusion"...it's the "business of show"...you've got to look "beautiful"...you've got to seem "happy"...it's part and parcel of the whole "show" that we think are all living this "wonderful life"...they are...but it's not half as "wonderful" as they make you think it is...it is the business of "dreams", after all...so, they "play act" that "dream" for us...and we sing into hairbrushes and play air guitar - dreaming of this "wonderful life" - and though it IS a darn sight more "wonderful" than the lives of 99.9999% of people, just remember that the "gloss" is added by a make-up lady in the trailer...the "lighting engineer" puts the light in the most "attractive" position (which hides the freckle on their chin and the make-up lady pops on some powder, so you don't see it at all on camera)...the footage is edited, the sound is "enhanced", the picture airbrushed, etc....

"Star people Counting your money 'til your soul turns green Star people Counting the cost of your desire to be seen

I do not count myself among you I may be living in a dream It's just there seems so many of you Can't help but hope there's a difference between You and Me?

You're a star! (I'm talking to you) You're a star!

Maybe your mama gave you up, boy? (It's the same old, same old) Maybe your daddy didn't love you enough, girl? How much is enough?

Star people! Never forget your secret's safe with me Just look at all the "wonderful people" Trying to forget they had to PAY for what you see:

It's a dream! With a nightmare stuck in the middle

But listen, brother, where would you be Without all this attention?

You'd die, I'd die, We'd die, Wouldn't we? Well, wouldn't we?

You're a star! (I'm talking to you) You're a star!

And you should go far!

Maybe your mama gave you up, boy? It's the same old, same old! Maybe your daddy didn't love you enough, girl? How much is enough?

I said, talk about your mother, Talk about your father, Talk about the people, Who have made you what you are...

breastle screen for HLA Adventure Need help designing one 889
True, but that is no excuse. And the present administration is pushing hard to have the laws...

Talk about your teacher, The bully boy that beat ya, Talk about the people that have paid, For that new sports car!

Did you get off on a bad foot, baby? Do you have a little tale to tell? Is that why you're a star? Is that what makes a star?

Well, nothing comes from nothing, baby That fame and fortune's "heaven-sent" And who gives a f**k about your problems, darling When you can pay the rent?

Care and Feeding of persons 888
snip snip What is striking with the movie, and even more with the music, business(es) is that they are dragged kicking and...

How much is enough?"

"Star People '97", George Michael

Beth :)


List | Previous | Next

Care and Feeding of persons 888

Alt Folklore Computers Newsgroups

Care and Feeding of persons 886